JOHN (JOHNNY) R. MCCONNELL

UPDATE: October 4, 2007 I spoke this morning with Jackie McConnell, John's widow, and have some additional information for all of you who have expressed sorrow at John's passing and sympathy and concern for his family. Jackie was wonderfully warm and gracious to speak with me at such a difficult time for her and the family, and I thank her so much for her time.

Jackie and I had a lovely conversation, given the circumstances, and she spoke so eloquently of John's battle with cancer, of how proud John was of their two sons, Jason and Kevin and their families, and how much he doted on his grandchildren Peyton and Willem.

For those who have inquired, John's mother, Gladys, known to many of us, is still alive and in a nursing home, but Jackie says that she must use a wheelchair and that her mental faculties are not what they once were.

I mentioned this blog to Jackie, and gave her the web address. She said that she will pass it along to their sons, who she believes will be interested to see what we have written about John. I told her that we would welcome any comment they (or she) might wish to make, if any, in memory of John.

John's obituary ran in today's Houston Chronicle, and I am including it here, along with a more recent picture than those which have been added by Nicki (no disrespect to Nicki, of course). Also, Jackie informed me that she has given the pertinent information to The Childress Index, which will also run an obit. The obit contains more information about John, some of which we already knew, like his love of golf, plus information about services.

John Robert McConnell, of Spring, Texas was born on the 31st of December 1944 in San Francisco, California, passed away on the 1st of October 2007. John is a former resident of Childress, Texas where he spent his earlier years in life. John was at his best while on the golf course where he was an avid golfer; John also enjoyed hunting and fishing, he was one that truly appreciated his family and friends. John was an employee with Reliance Steel and Aluminum for seven years and in the business for over 35 years. John is survived by his loving and caring wife of 40 years, Jackie, his sons Jason McConnell and wife Lisa, Kevin McConnell and wife Nicole, and two wonderful grandchildren, Peyton and Willem. John's family would like you to join them at his memorial service celebrating his life, Friday the 5th of October 2007 at Forest Park The Woodlands Chapel at one o'clock in the afternoon with Pastor Don Kidd officiating.

At the end of our conversation, I told Jackie that many of our classmates were thinking of John, and our shared history, and of her and the family, and that I was certain they would all be in our thoughts today, tomorrow and in days to come. I urge those of you who haven't left a comment or an anecdote to please do so, as I am sure it will be appreciated by John's family.

After my conversation with Jackie, I called Forest Park The Woodlands Funeral Home regarding whether they had a means for us to leave online condolences. I was advised that by tomorrow we will be able to access a memorial website at mem.com, enter John's name, and at the obit site there will be a link so that we may write a message for the family.

Jim left a "Comment" on the blog yesterday that he regretted not getting in touch with Johnny in later years, and I have had others express the same to me in e-mails. Perhaps we should all take this as a reminder not to put off getting in touch with old friends, or family, or anyone who means something to us, because one day it may be too late.

In sadness,
Jennifer

Posted October 2, 2007

Word came this evening via phone call from Pat Davenport Shapiro, who just heard through a friend of hers, that Johnny McConnell died last night in hospice care at his home in Spring, Texas (a suburb of Houston). As some of you will know, Johnny had battled cancer for the past several years. I last talked with him while Yahn and I were still living in Houston, probably about five or six years ago, and he was undergoing treatment at the time but, if I recall correctly, seemed to be in a bit of a remission. It was obvious the disease had taken a toll, but he was determined to do all he could to overcome it. Pat said that it's her understanding that he didn't actually die of the cancer, but that his liver finally gave out, possibly due to all his cancer treatments.

I know that many of us have many good memories of Johnny, inextricably intertwined with our memories of growing up in Childress. Johnny was actually the first boy outside my family who ever kissed me, chastely on the cheek, as a result of playing "Spin the Bottle" at a wiener roast for the gang held at his house when we were in fifth grade. And of course I remember him at the Country Club, not only playing golf with Jim and Reed, but at the Country Club dances and hay rides that they had for us young'uns.

I have Johnny's home address and telephone number if anyone wants to send a card or place a call to his widow, Jacki. Just let me know by e-mail (yahnjenn@cox.net) and I will provide the information. I am also checking the Houston Chronicle obit page (nothing today, but possibly tomorrow) to see if there is a notice there. At this juncture, I don't know anything about services, and neither did Pat. If I learn more, I will update this notice.

I am hopeful that some of you will choose to comment, or tell a story, about Johnny here on the blog.

So sorry to bring bad news, but I thought the class would want to know.

JOYEAUX ANNIVERSAIRE, CHER PAULA !

Yesterday, September 1st, would have been Paula's 62nd birthday. I spent a good part of the day "with" her ... or at least with my memories and thoughts of her. As I am sure most of you have felt about your loved ones and cherished friends, Paula left us far too soon ... or at least "too soon" in our own minds, despite any great universal plan or wheel of life. Although she does come back to me each time I speak her name, or think of her, or call up her image, of course it is still not the same as having my living, breathing friend next to me, to laugh with, and to share confidences and stories as we once did.

Paula was, both literally and figuratively speaking, one of my oldest (she would hate that word even now!) and dearest friends. We met as pre-kindergarten aged children in Sunday School at the (original) Church of Christ in Childress. Some of my earliest memories are of going to her house, or of her coming to my house, after church, to have lunch (usually fried chicken or take-out 'burgers, depending on whether the lady of the house wanted to cook that day), and then playing throughout the afternoon with the joy and intensity that only children seem able to muster. It was through Paula that I first met Linda Kay, who lived in the next block from Paula's house.

Paula, and Linda Kay, and my cousin Linda Sally and I all attended the elementary school attached to what was then Childress Junior High school. I had also known Pat (whose parents were BFFs with my parents, at least for a while) since we were toddlers, and she joined us at that elementary school, I believe in fifth grade. (Linda Sally's mother, Charlotte, was my teacher that year, although I seem to recall there was another fifth grade teacher, as well). When we entered Junior High, Raenell, Shirley and JoAnn gravitated to our little group. Lynn came along a year or so later, and by the time we were all at Childress High School, we were the Naughty Nine!

Anyone who knew Paula remembers her absolute love of and joy in life, her fearlessness in trying new things, her daredevil sense (shared by others of us, for better or worse) that nothing could possibly hurt her. I remember her throwing herself off the high diving board at the City Park pool, practicing until she perfected the swan dive, the jackknife, the tuck, and of course, the cannonball. We were definitely "water babies" who couldn't get enough of the pool, to the chagrin of our parents who had to cajole and/or threaten us to get us out when it was time to leave.

For a time, Paula and I were so close that our families joked that one of us might as well live with the other. The mayhem which could have resulted from that arrangement probably stifled that particular thought fairly quickly.

As all friends do, we had our disagreements and arguments, which could sometimes become quite dramatic. Once when Paula was spending the night with me, we got into some silly argument over some non-essential subject, and I remember Paula grabbing one of my soft stuffed animals and whacking me over the head with it, while I laughed and laughed at the absurdity of the situation. Not even an hour later, we were sharing ice cream, and records, and dreams for our future. That memory will stay with me always, with love, I assure you.

I remember Paula's mother, Lorraine, making Paula's red dress for the "Peppermint Lounge" (our Junior year) Junior-Senior banquet. The dress was drop-dead gorgeous, as was Paula in it, and I hate to think how many hours Lorraine worked on it. Paula went to the banquet with Jackie Petty, and a few years ago I was fortunate to obtain (from Lorraine) a VHS tape (transferred from 8 mm) that showed Paula and Jackie dancing after the banquet. It is truly magical to be able to see her with that red dress swirling with her movements ... and to see the others on the tape ... again, in microcosm, these long years later. At the same time, I obtained a tape (also transferred from 8 mm) from Linda Kay of one of her birthday slumber parties, and there we are, "immortalized" again ... Linda Kay, Paula, Pat, Linda Sally, Pam Hughes, me ... about fifth grade, glorying in fifth grade slumber party revelry. I had the tapes copied together, sequentially, and treasure my copy to this day.

Paula was the Childress friend with whom I was in most constant contact after graduation, although some of the other girls and I had periodic get-togethers, usually when I was visiting there. When Paula was diagnosed with her cancer early in 2001, she inadvertently set in motion a "gift" for the rest of us. I've related previously in this blog (the "BFF" section) how the Naughty Nine (and other friends) all came together one last time as a group, on February 5, 2002. And, after we lost our Paula a few short months later, we were moved to reconnect the bonds of friendship, and most of us nuture those bonds to this day.

At Paula's funeral, in May 2002, her family honored us by insisting that our group enter the services separately, just before the immediate family, and we were seated in a separate section, also at the direction of Paula's family, in loving acknowledgment of our "special" relationship with Paula. Jimmy Smith (Raenell's husband) sang "Peace in the Valley" so perfectly that there was not a dry eye in the house ... not that there were many, anyway. And I ... and the girls ... felt SO honored and surprised that as part of the eulogy, at the family's request, the minister read something that was especially written to place beside and then put into the casket with with Paula, bearing all our signatures. It said, in part:

"We were the Nine ... the 'Naughty Nine' as we liked to style ourselves in those more innocent and carefree days, before pain, and age and life itself swept us up and carried us along, caught in its inexorable current. Not really 'naughty', but more adventurous, and full of fun, and eager to challenge the world and make it our own. We grew to the edge of maturity together, and grew to love each other, and fought with each other, and fought together against those who didn't understand, or didn't care, or were thoughtless or cruel. We were the Nine.

"Time passes, and friendships fade, but throughout the years, there has been a bond that tied us, one to another, even unto death ... even to this day, and beyond. Paula is our first lost sister. But each of us will follow, in our turn. And yet, somehow, the Nine remain, the Nine endure.

"We were the Nine, we are the Nine, we will be the Nine again, when all of us have embarked on that same journey that now takes Paula from this place and time. ... We who remain wish her bon voyage ... until we meet again.

"We are the Nine."

Raenell, Shirley and I rode with Lynn to the cemetery service, lost in our own thoughts and memories for the most part. Lynn parked the car (I was "shotgun", as usual) and we walked slowly toward the grave site. After a few minutes, Lynn and I were looking around, wondering what had happened to Raenell and Shirley. We both looked back at the same time, and saw Rae and Shirl frantically beating on the back window of Lynn's car. Lynn had accidentally locked them in the back seat by tripping the locks as she exited the car. And I believe I could hear Paula's laughter carried on the constant wind ....

Nicki and I discussed this topic before I posted, and we are both hopeful that some of you will add your thoughts, and comments, and memories of Paula. Or, if there is someone of the class you wish to memorialize, please do so. The blog is a marvel, and a wonder, and a means of time travel ... from the past to the present, and ideally into the future. At the risk of redundancy, we truly want to hear your voices ....